Closing the Book

I used to be a bookstore manager. When I was hand selling books (which is one of my all-time favorite things to do) I would marvel at the fact that some people were afraid of reading a book that they might not like! "What if it offends me?" "What if there are bad words I wouldn't want to read?" "What if my child shouldn't be exposed to something like that?"

That always struck me as odd. My answer was always the same, "Just close the book!!" "You have the power." "You don't have to read everything you start."

Today I closed the book. I guess that's kind of figurative on my year of reading. It's the end of a busy year and my reading numbers are way down - darn you, day-job! But it's also what I literally did while I was reading a book while waiting for one of my sons at an Oral Surgeon's office.

My son is a daddy now, a grown man. Today I was just his "escort"; someone who would drive him to the appointment and then walk him woozily out to the car, "escort" him home, administer food and pain meds and wait until his wife got home to turn over the nursing duties too. Easy peasy stuff. I had just the book for the wait; a thin volume with an interesting story premise.

The waiting room was plush and comfortable. It was the perfect place to read a book on this overcast day. Perfect, perfect...

But my book reading was not going as planned. My uncomfortable button had been "pushed" a few times already. I had even resorted to my "glossing over" technique and was trying to skim over parts to see where I could pick up the story again when I finally hit a sentence by one of the main characters half way through the book.

"I guess it's a choice we make," she said.
"What's a choice?" I asked.
And she said, "How much of the world we let in."

It was then that I decided that I had the power all along. This just wasn't the book for me. Now I did what I told many people to do; I took my own advice and closed the book! There's too many books waiting for me out there to spend my time on a book that's not for me.

Abandoned: Love is the Higher Law by David Levithan
Currently Reading: The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown & June Bug by Chris Fabry

Limbo Week

The week between Christmas and New Year's has always felt like a week in limbo to me.

A week between the past and the future.

I'm not quite ready to commit to resolutions but I'm ready to start planning and plotting.(I'm making my lists and pondering over what to really commit to!) This week seems to be a gift of time; where everything stands still. No December rush, no January sprint.I like the odd feeling.

In my "time suspended" week I think I'll get a pedicure, take a walk, visit a friend in need, read in bed, clean a little, play at the park with a special someone, finish my report cards, read a little more, and soak up this moment to breathe.


Finished last night - Altared Plans by Rebecca Cornish Talley
Currently Reading - The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown

The Night Before Christmas

Yes, it's the night before Christmas and although my "littles" are now "bigs" I am still wrapping last minute gifts and filling last minute stockings for them. It feels great! I'm up to 3 Christmas movies while I wrap!

I've hardly had more than a minute to read our Book Group read, The Lost Symbol, by Dan Brown. We had a fabulous trip to Washington DC two years ago and I feel I am reliving it as I read. (minus the intrigue and danger!) I am blocking out time to read as we travel tomorrow...."I will remember my booklight, I will remember my booklight, I will remember my booklight!!" I have lots more books to read this vacation - I'm scheduling it now~!

We've thought about our Christmas traditions this year and have decided to start a few new ones.

• As we travel we're going to read O. Henry's The Gift of the Magi aloud to each other. It was fun to find the book at the second hand store for only 75 cents!!
• Tonight we're going to a Christmas service where a friend is singing, another new tradition to start. I can't wait for more carols and a performance that I'm NOT in!
• Today we had pizza for lunch when our daughter and son in law came over. We loved that. What a fun tradition to start.
• Tomorrow we are traveling to our oldest son's brand new house. Their tradition is to make homemade pizzas on Christmas afternoon and play games. I love that tradition! We'll join in and adopt that too! (I love pizza two days in a row!)
• Hot cocoa and backgammon - we're dusting off this tradition from years ago and giving it a new twist. I'm enjoying the changes!!
• Movies at the theater the day after Christmas!!! Bring on the popcorn and soda and ignore the malls!

Changes are not easy, I'll miss my kiddos that are not with me this year, but I'm determined to face the changes with a smile. I'm ready to make some memories....Merry Christmas to all!

Best of 2009

I've been thinking of the Best of.... for quite awhile now and feel I'm ready to take a stab at a few of these... So here goes.

Best trip of 2009 - Hands down goes to "Roadtrip - the Incredible Journey (or 6500 miles with just the two of us!) We visited 5 states and Canada! Golly, we are so blessed and the trip was amazing!

Best Restaurant Moment of 2009 - A steakhouse in Butte, Montana. Our son proposed to his girlfriend after we finished a fantastic dinner!! What a privilege to be there. Thanks for the great food AND memories! By the way, try MacKenzie River Pizza Company if you're ever in Butte, Montana! Fantastic!
Best Book of 2009 - Can I choose two?!?! Please, please! I even polled my sister in law to see if she could help me break the tie, but she had the very same answers I did! So I am declaring it a dead heat! The Help by Kathryn Stockett and The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. Two very different books with incredible voice!! They sucked me in from page 1. They are real winners!!





























Best Night Out of 2009 - Las Vegas with all of my kiddos!! A night on the strip with all of them was a highlight. Fun, mesmerizing; like Disneyland for very big people....just something to be experienced. We had a blast!! We were there for a son's wedding so we were all happy and jolly and ready for fun!

Best Album of 2009 - Rob Thomas' Cradlesong. As a matter of fact I'll listen to anything he sings! Can someone load up my iPod please?!?!

Best Memory of 2009 - A three way for sure...three weddings! It took my breath away as we added to our family...in some ways it felt like childbirth all over again. The outcome is remarkably sweet and I cherish these new members of our family!






The year isn't quite over yet...there's more to enjoy, remember, and record.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I am struggling to teach my first grade class math this year. I've never had a year like this before. I've worried and whined, complained and cajoled. Nothing was working. Then I made a mind change. I decided to look at what they DID know, what resources I had, and start over. Yep, end of October and I was starting over with math!

I decided to be grateful for what I had been given and make the most of it. They are curious; they love to discover and play - work with that! It was a revelation of sorts. We pulled out the tubs and have been counting and discovering. And what do you know....we are growing into mathematicians!! After only a month! Now, it's still not easy and I know I still have miles to go, but I am able to see progress and a deeper understanding. It has been a load of work on my part; not easy or pleasant. I am the one who has stretched and grown and for that I am grateful!!

I needed to be the one to learn the higher law; the one of Thanksgiving! I already had blessings - I just forgot to notice them. They are anxious to learn; I don't have to struggle alone. I hope I have learned to assess their needs more accurately, to look to MY resources, and how to swallow my pride and ask for help!!

"How wonderful it would be if we could help our children and grandchildren to learn thanksgiving at an early age. Thanksgiving opens the doors. It changes a child's personality. A child is resentful, negative-or thankful. Thankful children want to give, they radiate happiness, they draw people." ~ Sir John Templeton

I want to be a more Thankful person midst the challenges and not just after!! I'll start today!

I am grateful for.... my testimony, the Gospel, my children, family, friends, first grade students, my husband - Rich, blogging friends and relationships, jobs, crisp weather, new blankets, football, airplanes, book group, trips, Emma-Gracie-Noah-Ariel-Hero-Jase (what great joys!), bookstores!!, Sonic, shopping, libraries, sunsets, gardens, choices, lotion, bed, lipgloss, soft socks, books!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving !!!

Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye is NOT my favorite thing to do....

As a child it meant sad airport kisses as we left daddy at the terminal gate, goodbyes to grandparents each summer vacation, and farewell to friends when we moved - again!!

I grew a bit and goodbyes still were NOT my favorite thing to do....

I sent a young man far away for two years and bid adieu to High School friends who I knew I would never see again. I said goodbye to double flips on the sidelines, size 6 jeans, stick straight hair, mini skirts, carefree days. I said goodbye to childhood.

I said goodbye to single life (okay, that was one goodbye that was not so hard!! As a matter of fact, I really scored in that department - thank you, honey!) But saying goodbye to snuggles and cuddles and baby breath was harder than I imagined. Loose teeth, feety pajamas, Saturday morning cartoons are a thing of the past now. When did I wave goodbye to them?

Today I said my goodbyes to a good friend. I stood by her bed tonight, midst tubes and machines, and told her I was there with her. Her goodbye comes too soon for us. We were not ready. I left her side, but not before tucking her grown daughter in beside her so she could sleep with mom one last night. Saying goodbye is NOT my favorite thing to do...

I am going to have to flip this coin and see the other part of goodbye. I am going to have to see the hello!! For every goodbye at the airport there was always a hello hug at the other end. I just forgot to remember it. It will take some practice this time, but I need to remember that there is a hello hug somewhere....

Things I KNOW....

I know Halloween is supposed to be all about the kids but it's truly fun for me...now!


I know that field trips are hard but holidays are harder as a teacher. Because of that truth, we took 100 first graders to the Children's Museum on the day before Halloween. It was great. No costumes, no class parties and the kids thought it was the "best day ever"!!! That's a direct quote! At the end of the day they are content with a treat from the teacher and we all leave tired and with a big smile.

I know relationships are worth it! All 5 of my kiddos made it to Las Vegas to celebrate their brother's wedding and a creation of a new family!!


I know that road trips are fun. But you will never catch me going across this new bridge at the Hoover Dam when it opens!! No way!!

I know that the first bite is the best! Maybe that's why fun-size candy bars are the perfect size...one bite!

I know that I am an expert at letting time get all sucked up... by reading blogs, watching football, surfing the internet. I really have such little self control at times!

I know a good book will keep me up, deprive me of sleep and draw me in....
good books this month . . .
Fablehaven by Brandon Mull ( a book group read for October that most all enjoyed. Interesting discussions, insight and snacks to match!!)
Die For You by Lisa Unger. A first for this author for me. You would think you know the one you married. But when they take your identity and nearly your life, it makes you think about everything.
If I Stay by Gayle Forman. An accomplished cellist, a loving family, a fun snow day adventure and tragedy collide. Narrated by the main character through flashbacks and out of body observation - I found it intriguing. The push and pull of heart-rending choices.
Taken by Storm by Angela Morrison. How do you help someone recover when all is lost? Who defines who we are? How can we find value in life again? Is it by facing our fears, learning to trust? Two characters from opposite backgrounds and experiences are cast together in a small town in the Pacific Northwest where one is recrafting a life and another is ready to start a new one. Scuba diving plays a large role in this book and would be my only complaint....when it got a little technical and beyond my basic understanding I felt lost. It truly is a minor complaint though...the rest was worth the journey.


I know where to find peace.